Lessons Learned from a Toddler

*Note: This posting orginially appeared in another blog I write for (The Domestic Diva Daily at http://luv2write78.pnn.com/11411-the-front-page ) in July 2009.  The frustration and weariness that I experienced back then when searching for a job, remains applicable to my life situation today.  My husband and I are daily searching for full-time work and we have yet to find something but God has been faithful and enabled my husband and I both to acquire part-time jobs whereby we are able to pay the bills and meet the needs of our family.  However, it still can be discouraging at times when applying for so many full-time positions and hearing only negative responses.  Re-reading this older post reminded me of the lesson my toddler taught me last summer and brought some encouragement my way today - may it do the same for you! :)


This whole economy thing has been getting me down lately. The past 8 months my husband and I have both continously filled out job applications and have consistently received letters of "although you are more than qualified for this position, you are not the best qualified." It's been a constant socking to my stomach every time a rejection letter arrives in the mail or my email inbox. How long can this possibly go on? My husband and I both graduated with either graduate degrees or post-graduate degrees in December 2008 and yet no one wants to hire us. So, I've been a bit down lately.

The other morning, I was once again searching the internet for job postings in my area when I heard my 16 month old coming through the kitchen towards my office. Her feet thudded the floor with every step she took. She's been walking about 2 months now and yet she still wavers, falters at times when she walks - especially when she is excited. I stopped my job search for awhile to watch her meander throughout the house. Most of the time she made it successfully to her destination, however on other occasions, she fell to the hardwood floor with a loud thud. Upon her unsuccessful attempts of walking, she would scrunch up her face and begin to whine a little and then she would stop. She didn't waste much time on whining, but rather she pulled herself back up and proceeded to go towards whatever item for which she was searching.

As I sat watching her and thinking about my own attempts to find a job, I realized that maybe I've been whining too much in the situation I find myself in - no job for me, no job for hubby. Seeing my 16 month old pull herself up time and time again, no matter how many times she had fallen, brough an epiphany to me: stand up, girl! Dust your feet off! Stop whining about your jobless situation and just keep filling out those applications. One of them is bound to come back with a positive response, or at least an interview!

So, here I sit searching for jobs, like I do every day, and I have a bit more bounce in my step, a sunnier disposition for my current situation. I am qualified to do my job in the field of education, there will be a job coming my way, but I can't dwell on all the rejection notices but rather I just need to pull myself up and model the persistency of my almost-toddler girl. It's a new day, maybe today is my day to secure a job! No time to whine here - especially since I do have little ones watching how I respond to defeat. Thank you, Daphne, for the lesson you've taught Mommy.  I am forever grateful! :-)

Keeping a Happy Attitude Amidst an Economic Crisis

The current economic state of our country has not only effected banks, CEOs, and politicians, but rather it has hit home most in the family. Marriage counselors have often stated that one of the major causes for fights between couples is that of finances and with the slippery economy our nation now faces, it is no wonder that relationships among family members is being hit hardest. How can one keep a marriage relationship strong and thriving when a spouse has recently lost his job? How can familial relationships encourage one another even when parents are having to cut back and cannot afford to spend money on fun items for their children or take a trip to a local museum, amusement park, or restaurant? With so many talking heads saying that the economy has yet to hit rock bottom, how can our marriage and family relationships survive the pressures and demands that face us?

It is important to remember that love is not built on wealth or rather love should not base its foundation upon the expectation of receiving things, having a certain lifestyle for when hard times come like the current economic crisis, this "love" will fold and collapse upon which it becomes too costly to get a divorce, thus the couple is forced to simply coexist. That idea sickens me to the very core as I have a family and the idea of not being able to afford my kids the simple luxuries of trips to the zoo, eating out once a week, going to the movies, etc. disheartens me. And the fact that my husband and I are both without jobs is also extremely troublesome but what can we do except to keep plugging away, filling out job applications, and praying that something soon will turn up!

Does this state of lack of jobs affect my relationship with husband and children? I would be lying if I said it didn't but I also have to remember that this state is not what defines the love my husband and I have for each other. We both meant the whole idea of "for richer or for poorer." Sure, we're in the "poorer" state of our lives, actually the poorest ever in our ten year marriage, but so what? We love and support each other and we are not going to let this economy cause a rift or struggle between us nor will we sit and mope and become irritated about the things we cannot do nor afford. We love our kids and we will continue to have family time whether that means playing games at home instead of going to the movies or eating hamburgers at home instead of eating out at a restaurant.

Any family or marriage relationship can survive these difficult economic times, but it will not be easy. We must determine to make the relationships work and figure out creative ways in which to develop, cultivate, and strengthen the love in these relationships that are most important to us. There is no need to be down, depressed, irritated, and agitated during today's economic state; those feelings will arise, but look around you and see what is most important - your family, your spouse, your children. Seize every opportunity to show them love for their love will reciprocate and may propel you forward to finding the job you need to make it through this crisis. And when you come out on the other side, you will not be alone but rather you will have your most significant relationships with you.